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Jan. 3rd, 2017 12:48 amIt wasn't supposed to happen like this.
They were all supposed to live happily ever after. Sirius would watch the Potters raise his godson, they would win the war and nobody would have to live in hiding any longer. They were careful. They were all so careful, and isn't that how it's supposed to go? If they're careful, and if they do everything right, they can all live. That's how it was sold to them. That was the pretty bow that was placed on top.
So how in the world did Sirius find himself here, hollow, sitting atop the corpse of his best friend - his brother - after shaking him violently in a futile effort to wake him?
Why do his eyes burn? Why does his throat feel raw, as if he's been screaming? Has he been screaming?
How does Lily still look so beautiful, her fire hair fanned across the floor with emerald eyes staring blankly upward, crumpled with such the macabre elegance of a porcelain doll discarded by a child.
Why is she so cold so fast?
How is Harry still here? His little Harry, the little fawn, wailing in his crib with a cut on his head that looks almost carved. His poor boy must be terrified, and hungry, and that's the only thing that makes Sirius move again. He walks around the nursery, unable to look or acknowledge Lily on the ground as he gathers the basic necessities to keep Harry comfortable until he can go shopping, and he stuffs it all in a bag he finds to sling over his shoulder before wrapping Harry up in a blanket and carrying him out, head against Sirius' shoulder to block his view.
And then Hagrid is there, and Hagrid is trying to take Harry away from him. He's the godfather, he explains. The godfather who doesn't Merlin's left nut what Dumbledore wants. Dumbledore, who insisted that there was a traitor among them and failed to mention that he was handing out secret missions, making them all doubt each other that much deeper. Dumbledore, who sent Hagrid - the non-casting wizard - to fetch Harry like he was a fucking parcel, instead of coming to get the poor boy himself. Dumbledore who wanted to doom Harry to a life with miserable parents in order to keep him in hiding, as if Sirius wouldn't do everything it took to make sure that his godson would stay safe.
He'd die before giving his boy to Dumbledore.
He argues until he can't argue anymore, and that's when he does it - he stupefies the poor giant before getting on his bike and taking off, kidnapping the savior of the wizarding world, and he goes to the only place that he can. The only person in the world he knows he can still trust.
He knocks on Remus' door with a sleeping infant in his arm, and when the door opens he speaks with a flat numbness.
"I stole the baby."
They were all supposed to live happily ever after. Sirius would watch the Potters raise his godson, they would win the war and nobody would have to live in hiding any longer. They were careful. They were all so careful, and isn't that how it's supposed to go? If they're careful, and if they do everything right, they can all live. That's how it was sold to them. That was the pretty bow that was placed on top.
So how in the world did Sirius find himself here, hollow, sitting atop the corpse of his best friend - his brother - after shaking him violently in a futile effort to wake him?
Why do his eyes burn? Why does his throat feel raw, as if he's been screaming? Has he been screaming?
How does Lily still look so beautiful, her fire hair fanned across the floor with emerald eyes staring blankly upward, crumpled with such the macabre elegance of a porcelain doll discarded by a child.
Why is she so cold so fast?
How is Harry still here? His little Harry, the little fawn, wailing in his crib with a cut on his head that looks almost carved. His poor boy must be terrified, and hungry, and that's the only thing that makes Sirius move again. He walks around the nursery, unable to look or acknowledge Lily on the ground as he gathers the basic necessities to keep Harry comfortable until he can go shopping, and he stuffs it all in a bag he finds to sling over his shoulder before wrapping Harry up in a blanket and carrying him out, head against Sirius' shoulder to block his view.
And then Hagrid is there, and Hagrid is trying to take Harry away from him. He's the godfather, he explains. The godfather who doesn't Merlin's left nut what Dumbledore wants. Dumbledore, who insisted that there was a traitor among them and failed to mention that he was handing out secret missions, making them all doubt each other that much deeper. Dumbledore, who sent Hagrid - the non-casting wizard - to fetch Harry like he was a fucking parcel, instead of coming to get the poor boy himself. Dumbledore who wanted to doom Harry to a life with miserable parents in order to keep him in hiding, as if Sirius wouldn't do everything it took to make sure that his godson would stay safe.
He'd die before giving his boy to Dumbledore.
He argues until he can't argue anymore, and that's when he does it - he stupefies the poor giant before getting on his bike and taking off, kidnapping the savior of the wizarding world, and he goes to the only place that he can. The only person in the world he knows he can still trust.
He knocks on Remus' door with a sleeping infant in his arm, and when the door opens he speaks with a flat numbness.
"I stole the baby."
